A fellow Mission Society Missionary, Angela, posted parts of this on her blog, and I found it so incredibly encouraging. This past year has been challenging--spiritually, physically, and emotionally. Read on!
Among the heartache is hope, amidst the suffering is grace, behind the ambiguity is a divine plan, and I am created in the image of God.
You will find God to be more faithful than you ever dreamed He could be, but you will also learn that He is more unpredictable than you wish He was. You will discover that His grace indeed is sufficient, but His ways are so much higher than your own that you cannot even imagine what the next step will look like. Your faith will be tested as you wonder if a good God would place a precious soul inside of a broken body.
You will discover, as you allow God to give you strength, that God is indeed very good. As you learn to love more and more, you'll understand more and more about God's love for broken and imperfect people. Temporal things will lose value and you will learn what is really important. Your heart will burst with joy and pride as you see small victories in life.
You'll appreciate more the fact that in heaven there will be no bad news, no pain, no suffering and no tears. You will wake up every morning aware of your need for a gracious and loving God. That is the greatest gift of all. We all desperately need Him, we just tend to become self sufficient and forget. It's not a road you would choose, but one day you will look back and you wouldn't trade that road for anything in the world.........
The Lord said to Gideon, "Go in the strength that you have......I will be with you". My advise would be...get out of bed every morning and put one foot in front of the other in the strength that you have. God will be with you every step that you take and His grace and strength will be more than enough!