Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Power of God

In April, I posted some random thoughts and prayer requests. I am still praying for the same things. Below you will find prayer requests, thoughts, and other random ramblings.

He is your praise and He is your God, who has done these great and awesome things for you which your eyes have seen. --Deuteronomy 10:21



God is in charge, we are not seeing past our problems.
Love you, Mom

  • I continue to struggle with both my faith and physical health. In many ways I am the healthiest that I have ever been, and in other ways, I am worn and exhausted, and it is taking a toll on my body. Physically--doctors have no answers, and my body continues to reject itself on different levels. Nine months ago, up until about three months ago, I could not use soap on my body, as it caused me to break out in a painful rash. There was nothing I could place on my skin. This ran it's course and once again, I am able to use soap. Within the past month, I have developed a different rash, that has turned into hives, and is now calming down. I am tired of my body rejecting itself. It is painful--both physically and emotionally.
  • I hurt my ankle at Grouse Mtn., therefore I did not run for a week. I have to be careful with it, although that does not keep me from running now. I also managed to hurt my neck while on holiday, but thankfully I have a fabulous chiropractor, and Dr. White fixed me right up.
  • I still wish I could afford a new car. The 1998 Subaru Forester has 234,000 miles on it and I had AAA tow it from our house to the automotive store yesterday. Subby is very sick. :(
  • I am still searching for a job teaching secondary mathematics. And not just any job. A fabulous job with wonderful co-workers and a great administration, like I had at Mac Arthur HS, in NEISD. I know I am an excellent teacher!
  • I would love to be given someones gently used clothes they don't want/wear anymore. I was blessed with some new shirts this summer! Now accepting dresses, skirts, pants, really, anything you would like to get rid of.
  • My personal faith--I am struggling in remembering the great things God has done and continues to do. I am having a hard time seeing beyond my own problems and looking to His power.
This past month, I quit reading my bible and praying. I decided it just didn't matter if I prayed or not. It wasn't changing anything. After months, none of my prayer requests have been fully answered--I still do not have a job, I am physically hurting, the car is worse off, I would really like a dress or two (I wear the same ones over and over!), my dreams are still quite vivid, and I feel that no relief has been given to me. I find myself hurting more and more--physically, emotionally, and spiritually. I shared this with four people. Each of them encouraged me to open up my bible and get back into the Word in one way or another.

Life with its way before us lies, Christ is the path, and Christ the prize. Fain not nor fear, His arms are near; He changeth not, and thou art dear.
--Hymn, Fight Thy Good Fight with all Thy Might

I picked up my bible and read. And then the next evening, the sermon was on the text I had just read the night prior. I do not remember what the text was, as I have been reading my bible daily since, and I can only absorb so much.

Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him. But he must ask in faith without any doubting, for the one who doubts is like the surf of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind. For that man ought not to expect that he will receive anything from the Lord, being a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways.
--James 1:2-8

We exult in hope of the glory of God. And not only this, but we also exult in our tribulations, knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance; and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope; and hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us.
--Romans 5:2-5

Why have we decided that when we're hurting, we must be doing something wrong? Trials and tribulations are not always because of our wrong doing. One lady in Sunday school, who had battled many years of cancer, said it so well. She said something to the effect of, I still hurt, I still struggle, I doubt, I fear, the angst is still there, and sometimes I am angry, but I am grounded in the hope that Jesus Christ gives us, and there is nothing that can take that away.

Psalm 911: He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the Lord, "My refuge and my fortress, My God, in whom I trust!"
--Psalm 91:1

As I was reading in Mark, I found a note in my bible that read, "I am not called to be successful; I am called to be faithful." At the same time, every little girl likes to dress up as a princess and pretend that they are successful, intelligent, beautiful, and loved. I am still a little girl. I still pretend. Maybe I need to change my view of successful.

As I have shared some of my struggles with my Mom and Dad, both of them have individually prayed with me. These are special moments in my life. God is powerful!