Teenager talk...

I thought I would share some quotes from my students...each of these is interesting to me, as it shares a piece of their culture.

• When I told the students they were not allowed to eat in the classroom, including cupcakes, a student retorted, "Miss T, you need to eat about 20 cupcakes. Men like thick women."
  
• I have a student that likes to greet me with, "Hey girl!" At first this bothered me, now I find it kind of amusing.
  
• After asking a student about her father, another girl chimes in, "Miss T, black people don't have Daddy's."

These are just a few of the things that I hear on a daily basis. I ask you to pray for each of my students.

Broken expectations

Once again, Jon Acuff writes a very timely entry.

The soft X.

December 1, 2010

I cried in the Chicago Airport.

And these were not tough guy, lumberjack, I just punched a mountain lion in the face with my bare fist kind of tears. These were sad and tired and give up tears.

I was flying home from a conference in Chicago. I had been the closing keynote speaker and it had gone really well. That’s not what I was crying about though. I was crying because of what I knew would happen when I landed.

I knew I would take the train to my car, grab work clothes, change in the handicapped stall and then disappear into a sea of cubicles. I didn’t hate my job, not at all, it just wasn’t what I felt called to do. The Stuff Christians Book wasn’t out yet, but the site was doing well. I had this completely different life starting to develop and it was hard to go back to work and act like Chicago had all been just a dream.

This was long before the opportunity at Dave Ramsey. This was a doldrums period where I was just writing and writing and writing, but things weren’t happening the way I thought they would.

I sat in meetings about TPS reports and budgets and would get frustrated with God, wondering if he even saw me. Wasn’t he the one who put this burning in my heart? Wasn’t it his call that I was answering? This wasn’t how life was supposed to go.

Have you ever felt that way?

Has there ever been a situation where you had an expectation that you felt like God simply wasn’t meeting? I think most of us have experienced that.

Right now, someone reading this blog is mourning a marriage that fell apart. You wanted to be the first in your family to have a grandkid for your parents, not the first to get divorced.

Right now, someone is in a gray cubicle and the degree they got, the passion they followed in college is a million miles away from how they spend 40+ hours every week.

Right now, there’s someone struggling with an issue that refuses to release it’s talons even though you’re occasionally able to shake it for a few “good weeks.”

Right now, someone had to send out wedding cancellation notes, because it’s off.

Right now, there’s a man who feels a lot less than a man because he doesn’t have a job and can’t provide for his family.

Right now there are a million different versions of “Don’t you see me God?” happening. And so we doubt and get angry and lonely. But we are not the only ones with expectations that go astray.

In Genesis 48, the same thing happens to Joseph, of the double rainbow coat fame. He has brought his two sons to his father Israel for his blessing. We don’t understand this culturally because we don’t really do this anymore, but this was a critical, massive thing that was about to take place. Manasseh was about to receive Israel’s blessing. That was what should happen. That was what Joseph expected.

Joseph the faithful. Joseph the former slave, former convict, former saved all of Egypt from death and destruction. Joseph had a great track record at this point. He was a deeply wise man of God. He knew what was about to happen. By lineage, by tradition, by faith, Manasseh was about to get blessed by Israel.

Only he doesn’t.

It doesn’t happen that way. Instead of doing what he should have done, Israel crosses his arms and forms an X, placing his hands on the heads of the wrong children. He blesses Ephraim, the wrong son in Joseph’s mind.

And in 48:17 we see what happens: When Joseph saw his father placing his right hand on Ephraim’s head he was displeased; so he took hold of his father’s hand to move it from Ephraim’s head to Manasseh’s head.

Joseph has lived his entire life with one belief about how a blessing is passed down. This is his, “I got my Master’s Degree in teaching, I should get a teaching job” moment. This is his, “People get married after college, that’s what they do,” moment. This is what he’s always been ready for and it goes the exact opposite way.

So Joseph, like me or you trying to fix a mistake, says, “No, my father, this one is the firstborn; put your right hand on his head.”

And how does Israel respond? Does he say, “Oh, I am failing of sight and made a mistake?” Does he reply, “Thank you for correcting this situation?”

No.

He says simply, “I know, my son, I know.”

And that is an incredibly tender thing to say as someone’s expectations crumble.

And I think it’s something God still says to us, even today.

“I know, my son, I know. I know, my daughter, I know. That thing you wanted is not going to happen. Not the way you’ve always dreamed. I know this hurts. I know this stings. I know you feel like I am distant or not aware of where you are and who hurt you and what you think life was supposed to be like. I know in moments like this you doubt that I can count the hairs on your head or have your best in mind. But please, I am not done. I have barely started to reveal your life to you. I am the God who satisfies your desires with good things. That is me! And when it comes to your hopes and your fears and your dreams, I know, my son, I know.”

I think of this moment as the “soft x.”

I think of the tenderness of Israel with his arms outstretched and crossed. I think of our desires and our dreams and the times they don’t work. And above all, I think of a God who wants to tell you he hears you, he loves, he knows you. He is not disconnected or disinterested in who you are and who you want to be. Today, he says,

“I know, my son, I know.”

I am excited for my brother--and happy that he is getting married, although, it is difficult for me. He is my little brother. My friends in High School always thought I would be the first to get married, and have children, rather, I am not even dating, and I am the last. I like men, I keep my eyes open, and I gladly accept a date. Although, I have not found the correct man. I love Molly, Levi's fiancee--she is a beautiful woman, trying to live out life, honouring Christ.

As happy as I am for my brother (and Molly), it hurts to see him have what I have wanted since I was a little girl. It feels as though God is laughing at me. My brother will be the first to get married, my brother will have the first grandchild, what's left for me? This past year in a half has been filled with so many broken expectations, and each one of them bite, sting, and cause great pain! How about you put a little more salt on these hurting wounds?

The only thing I can do is cling to the fact that God is not done. He has just begun to reveal my life to me. I know God provides, and I know He has given me dreams, hopes, and goals for a reason. I must remember He is the God who satisfies my desires with good things.

San Antonio Marathon

Race: San Antonio Rock n Roll Full Marathon
Distance: 26.2 miles
Goal: Have fun! (I knew I could complete the 26.2 miles--I had just finished my first marathon three weeks prior!)
Goal Time: 03:45:00
Actual Time: 03:43:28 (8:31 min/mi)

Miles 1-8, I ran with my friend, Bee, and my new friend, Ed. Bee had a hamstring owie, so I chose to keep on going without her. Somewhere between miles 10 and 20, I sped up...oops, I should've kept pace. Around mile 17, a friend from church, Christy, saw me, and cheered me on! At mile 21.5 give or take, Mom and Dad came out and cheered me on. It was really cool when Dad started running with me! He asked me a couple questions--this was pretty much the only time I spoke during the 26.2 miles. It was fun to hear my Dad compare me to the energizer bunny. :) My last two miles were the absolute hardest, and I was ready to quit, although, I saw a friend, told him I needed some encouragement, and he encouraged me to keep on going. I can't remember what he said, it does not matter, he believed in me.

The last two tenths of a mile were difficult. We had to run up a little hill. As I was ready to quit, a woman looked at me and said, "look at all these men you've already beat, keep on running girl, you have it in you!" That little comment brought me to the finish line. Mom and Dad were able to get a couple pictures at the finish line. Mom even had a picture of me and a man wearing a shirt that said "Stop Forest Stop" right as I was crossing the finish line. Too bad that was on my phone, and my phone was stolen; I cannot share the picture.

I am thankful for all the encouragement I receive from people; I am thankful for people that believe in me; I am thankful for people that care for me. I am thankful for an incredible running coach.

Pictures...maybe later? They are on Dad's camera. He was able to get some great shots! :)

One thing at a time...

I've been going to a Thursday evening worship service, and one of the things we've been discussing is our sin and the positive and negative consequences directed to both ourselves and others. I also regularly read Jon Acuff's blog, "Stuff Christians Like."

He recently posted the following.

My friend used to deal drugs.

I tell you this, not to add an element of excitement to his testimony, as we are prone to do when we encounter someone who has a really crazy, Jason Bourne like testimony.

I tell you this, because two weeks ago he taught me an important lesson about faith.

We were talking about a famous singer who recently got arrested for having a bag of cocaine on him in a bathroom. The singer told the police that this was the first time he’s ever tried cocaine. When I told my friend that, he said it wasn’t true. He said it was virtually impossible for that to have been his first time. Knowing that my friend didn’t follow this musician or really have any knowledge of him, I asked him why he could be so sure of that.

Here is what he told me:

“No one carries drugs with them the first time they use. No one has the lack of fear it takes to carry a few grams of coke the very first time you try it. No one is alone in a bathroom, carrying a controlled substance the first time they have it. It starts slowly. You’re at a party where it is present. There are a few lines at a friend’s house. Somewhere you bump into it casually. You try it that way long before you decide you’ll be out at a nightclub with a bag of it in your pocket.”

That makes sense to me and more than that, it feels a lot like every other sin in my life.

Nothing I’ve ever done, whether lying or drugs, pornography or gossip, started out with a bag in a bathroom. As I’ve said before, no one wakes up on a Tuesday morning and says, “Today, I’m going to embezzle!” No one says, “At lunch, I’m going to get 10 DUIs and go to jail!” The path to completely destruction never starts out that way.

And neither did the Prodigal Son story. I can’t write about that story enough. It’s the perfect example of small steps to big stupid. In that story, we often like to think that the son got his inheritance from his father and then took a G6 jet straight to hookertown.

But that’s not what Luke 15 says. In fact, this is what we see in Luke 15:13

And not many days after the younger son gathered all together and took his journey into a far country, and there wasted his substance with riotous living.

Did you see that? The Prodigal Son packed. For days, he packed his bags before he left the father’s side. He took small steps. He made small mistakes and then he left.

So my question to you today, my question to me is pretty simple:

Are you packing?

Right now, today, are you packing your things to leave the safety of the father? Are you getting your things together for a disastrous trip to somewhere you’ve been before, down a path that will leave you wounded and beaten? Is your luggage laid open on your bed and you can’t get things together fast enough?

Are you packing?

If you are, tell a friend. Tell someone who knows you. Did you ever notice that about the Prodigal Son story? He had no friends. Other than the father and the older brother, no one cared that he was gone. His was a friendless existence. He packed alone.

Let’s put the luggage down. Let’s release the baggage. It’s time to stop leaving and instead start living.

Are you packing?

It makes me think about the things I do that I should not. I decide something's okay, just this once, just once more, and just once more--it becomes a habit. I am poking pins into that water balloon. A bunch of pins can create a gash the size of a knife over time.

I am thankful for accountability partners. I am thankful for the time of confession at church. I am also thankful for the assurance of forgiveness.

First Full Marathon: Chosen Marathon for Adoption

Marathon Tidbits

• I have wanted to run a full marathon (26.2 miles) since I was 14 years old.
• I chose to run Marathon for Adoption because the money went to families that are adopting and to an orphanage in Ukraine. A piece of me is forever in Ukraine.
• I have been training to run this full marathon since February.
• My first run with my club (Run A-Way Club) was 10 miles. I was already running 30 miles/week when I started running with the club.
• I have the best coach ever, John Purnell!
• I am blessed over and over through Coach, other runners, and with amazing health.

A year ago, I could hardly walk. Not because of my legs, or even my lungs, rather my epinephrine was sky rocket high. I was in fight or flight all the time. I was exhausted, terrified, and wanted to jump out of my skin. I wanted to die so that all those awful feelings and odd happenings in my body would go away. Jesus didn't let this happen. He gave me the best mother in the world, who refused to let me play sick, and forced me to walk, even when it was at 0.5 mph on the treadmill for 2 minutes at a time!

People run for many different reasons. My marathon was a 15 year dream come true. It is also a testimony to Gods healing power. Training has been intense--I went from hardly walking, to jogging, to running 15 miles per week, to running 30 miles per week, to running 60 miles per week. Some people describe me as intense, others describe me as dedicated or driven; the dole juice box describes me as daring and playing. However you choose to describe me, this race was a personal victory! Oh and why do I run? For fun! =)

Race: Chosen Marathon for Adoption Full Marathon
Distance: 26.2 miles
Goal: Have fun! Complete 26.2 miles!
Goal Time: Under 4 hours
Actual Time: 04:04:37 (9:20 min/mi)

Before the race I was nervous, excited, and ready to go. I was bummed that it was super humid and 80F outside. I decided my goal time might need to be revisited (it never really was). The course was quite hilly as well. I train on the flats--San Antonio and Houston are flat.

When the race started, it was still quite dark outside--this was awesome! For the first 2.5-3 miles I just ran. I had no clue how fast or slow I was going. I just went, and loved it! Early morning runs, where you just go, without looking at the heart rate, or pace, are my favourites. The first few miles were glorious in my opinion. I stopped and drank water at every water stop.

I think it was somewhere between miles 9 and 12 I was poured on. Yes, it was raining. Yes, it made the course slick.

As I approached "the summit," (up a huge hill) the half way point, I was told that I was the third female. I saw my parents, my brother and his now fiance, and my two good friends, Lauren and Steven, cheering me on. This was one of the best moments in my life. Not once has someone gone to a race of mine to cheer me on or to watch me. I think the best part of it all was Dad taking pictures, and then running about 1/10 mile with me. It took energy to hold back tears of joy. I am blessed with a family and friends that support me! I kept thinking you have 13.1 more miles to go, you cannot cry, too much energy.

The next 13.1 miles were pretty enjoyable, minus a few details.

Mile 21: My left foot went numb, and I had a really bad side stitch, and I stopped and relieved myself.

Miles 22-24: These were hard, the hills were really getting to me. I never felt like I could not run, rather I felt like I could not run another hill.

Mile 24: I was passed up by the female that won third place.

Mile 26: I could hardly believe that I was about finished! I crossed the finish line smiling. I had no clue what my time was going to be--I was happy and disappointed at the same time--4:04:37. I really wanted my time to be under 4 hours. But...I ran a good race, and my time is nothing to be ashamed of. Upon completing the race, Dad came and gave me a hug. I came in smiling, although when Dad gave me a hug, I cried--tears of joy, tears of completion, tears knowing that my family loves and supports me! At the finish line were two of the women in my club--Lisa and Tina--they had walked the half in their goal time!

This past week I have taken it a little slower, although, I was trained well and was not all that sore. Monday I ran 8 miles, Tuesday I ran mile repeats, Wednesday I ran 4 miles, Thursday 8 miles, I took off Friday, and ran 11 miles on Saturday. I am looking forward to another week of running, and my race in two weeks.

Other tidbits. I told my Mom and Dad that I would be shooting for a much slower pace. I figured given the heat and humidity, I was not going to be able to run like I had originally wanted to. I warned them that I would be slow at getting to the half way point. My mother was reiterating this to someone, also stating that it was my first full marathon. Many were pleasantly surprised when I reached the summit, and it was stated that I am a legitimate runner. :) This was a great comment to me! I'm legit!

Running is fun! =)

My fabulous fan club! Mom, Steven, Lauren, Levi, Molly!

Still smiling after 26.2 miles!

4:04:37! 4th woman to finish, and 2nd place in my age division (18-29 Female)

Confession: I'm terrified that Jesus will abandon me

Nor let my hope be lost. I know that safe with Him remains, protected by His power, what I've committed to His trust till the decisive hour.
--Henry Drummond

Sarah, a friend of mine from HS, posted the following in her blog; "I will not lie, I'm terrified that Jesus will abandon me, but that's against his character and against his word, and I know that to be true." I could not agree with her more!

I have accepted a teaching position at Westfield High School, in Houston, Texas. I moved to Houston on Wednesday, 22 September 2010. The Lords hand has been in this situation, since the interview. I have been blessed in numerous ways! I would love to share those blessings, but many I am not comfortable sharing on this medium, due to state laws, etc. Feel free to ask me anything in person.

Blessings I will share in this public forum:

• Great interview
• People reaching out to me in Houston
• People from San Antonio, reaching out to help me
• People that used to live in Houston, reaching out to me
• My brother introduced me to a friend from college, that has been a great friend to me!
  
• A friend from UTSA's Methodist group, Upgrade, has continued to bless my life with friendship and a place to stay, while I was looking for places to live
• Multiple teachers have reached out to me, and tried to help me in any way possible!
  
• A great department chair
  

Those are just a few of the incredible blessings I have received this past week. Thank you family and friends for continued prayers! Please keep them coming, as starting mid-year can be quite the challenge. I want prayers for joy! Each and everyday, I want the students to see joy in my life!

Rejoice the Lord is King, your Lord and King adore. Mortals, give thanks and sing and triumph evermore. Lift up your heart, lift up your voice, Rejoice, again I say, Rejoice! His Kingdom cannot fail, He rules o'er earth and heaven. The keys of death and hell are to our Jesus given. Lift up your heart, lift up your voice, Rejoice, again I say, rejoice!
--Rejoice the Lord is King

Risk Taking: Mission and Service

During a sermon I listened to on the way to church yesterday, the following statement was made. Life is built on character (the aggregate of features and traits that form the individual nature of some person). Character is built on decisions. Decisions are built on values. Values are built on faith. How are you glorifying Christ today through your actions?

Our sermon at First Presbyterian was about Risk Taking: Mission and Service. One of the points made was that mission and service always includes risks. During the prayer of confession, we prayed the following:

We have not loved neighbors as you commanded. Instead, we have done that which is safe, convenient, and comfortable. Help us to be willing to take risks to serve you faithfully in mission and service.

My actions chose to quit my job and move overseas. I took multiple risks. I planned on teaching for the year, and then loosely planned on staying and teaching for more than a year or two, and eventually coming stateside, continuing to teach. I also plan on marrying a wonderful man and starting my own family, preferably within the next few years. I have dreams, goals, and desires.

Teach me the mission appointed for me, what is my labor, and where it shall be.

I am paying the consequences of taking risks. I am without employment. I continue to search daily, for where God wants me to labor, and what it shall be. My search is nationwide. I have considered leaving the teaching field. In the sermon, the positive consequences were discussed, but not once were the negative consequences discussed, and how we deal with them, when they arise. Not all risks we take reap positive rewards.

My response you ask? I continue to pray that God will place me where He wants me. In the meantime I pray that I will serve Him with a joyous heart, while I am unemployed. God has given me this time; I want to glorify Christ through my actions today!

Update to Power of God

Wow! I have been positively overwhelmed both by God's answer to my pleas and to individuals complete generosity in so many different ways and forms.

• The original rash has gone away! I have replaced that rash with road rash, due to falling off of a bike during a triathlon. At least I know where this road rash came from! :) I owe a huge thank you to Ben, who cleaned my wounds after I finished the tri (Yes, I was able to get back on the bike, blood streaming down, determined, and in utter pain), my brother who cleaned my wounds with dish soap and water and then hydrogen peroxide, and lastly, my mother who then has cleaned my wounds daily, and dressed them with Aquaphor. Thank God for Eucerin, as I am not allergic to it! During this time of injury, I've had insult on the injuries, thanks to allergens. I am so blessed that each of the wounds are healing up quite nicely.
• My ankle is still hurting, and I also hurt the other ankle, a tad bit. I have not run for a week due to the road rash. I will start up with Saturday's long run! I can hardly wait, it's hard not to run!
  
• Subby is on it's way to the crusher! No more good times with the 1998 Subaru Forester. On the upside, thanks to the deer hitting our car in Idaho, I will soon be driving a Ford Freestyle. I am thankful for a vehicle to drive.
  
• I am still searching for a job teaching secondary mathematics. And not just any job. A fabulous job with wonderful co-workers and a great administration, like I had at Mac Arthur HS, in NEISD. I know I am an excellent teacher! (I just copied and pasted this from last time!)
  
• People have generously offered me clothes and bought me new items! Wow! Thank you, thank you!
• My personal faith: Two prayers have been answered. I had been praying for three months that I would find something, and I found both items within a short time period. What a blessing! It was good to know that God has not forgot about me, nor my prayers.
  

In closing, I want to share another great hymn.

God be merciful to me, on Thy grace I rest my plea. Plenteous in compassion Thou, blot out my transgressions now. Wash me, make me pure within; cleanse, O cleanse me from my sin. Gracious God, my heart renew, make my spirit right and true. Cast me not away from Thee; let Thy Spirit dwell in me. Thy salvation's joy impart, steadfast make my willing heart.
--God be merciful to me

Power of God

In April, I posted some random thoughts and prayer requests. I am still praying for the same things. Below you will find prayer requests, thoughts, and other random ramblings.

He is your praise and He is your God, who has done these great and awesome things for you which your eyes have seen. --Deuteronomy 10:21

"LOOK AT YOUR PROBLEMS IN THE LIGHT OF THE POWER OF GOD
INSTEAD OF LOOKING AT GOD IN THE LIGHT OF YOUR PROBLEMS."

God is in charge, we are not seeing past our problems.
Love you, Mom

• I continue to struggle with both my faith and physical health. In many ways I am the healthiest that I have ever been, and in other ways, I am worn and exhausted, and it is taking a toll on my body. Physically--doctors have no answers, and my body continues to reject itself on different levels. Nine months ago, up until about three months ago, I could not use soap on my body, as it caused me to break out in a painful rash. There was nothing I could place on my skin. This ran it's course and once again, I am able to use soap. Within the past month, I have developed a different rash, that has turned into hives, and is now calming down. I am tired of my body rejecting itself. It is painful--both physically and emotionally.
• I hurt my ankle at Grouse Mtn., therefore I did not run for a week. I have to be careful with it, although that does not keep me from running now. I also managed to hurt my neck while on holiday, but thankfully I have a fabulous chiropractor, and Dr. White fixed me right up.
• I still wish I could afford a new car. The 1998 Subaru Forester has 234,000 miles on it and I had AAA tow it from our house to the automotive store yesterday. Subby is very sick. :(
• I am still searching for a job teaching secondary mathematics. And not just any job. A fabulous job with wonderful co-workers and a great administration, like I had at Mac Arthur HS, in NEISD. I know I am an excellent teacher!
• I would love to be given someones gently used clothes they don't want/wear anymore. I was blessed with some new shirts this summer! Now accepting dresses, skirts, pants, really, anything you would like to get rid of.
• My personal faith--I am struggling in remembering the great things God has done and continues to do. I am having a hard time seeing beyond my own problems and looking to His power.
  

This past month, I quit reading my bible and praying. I decided it just didn't matter if I prayed or not. It wasn't changing anything. After months, none of my prayer requests have been fully answered--I still do not have a job, I am physically hurting, the car is worse off, I would really like a dress or two (I wear the same ones over and over!), my dreams are still quite vivid, and I feel that no relief has been given to me. I find myself hurting more and more--physically, emotionally, and spiritually. I shared this with four people. Each of them encouraged me to open up my bible and get back into the Word in one way or another.

Life with its way before us lies, Christ is the path, and Christ the prize. Fain not nor fear, His arms are near; He changeth not, and thou art dear.
--Hymn, Fight Thy Good Fight with all Thy Might

I picked up my bible and read. And then the next evening, the sermon was on the text I had just read the night prior. I do not remember what the text was, as I have been reading my bible daily since, and I can only absorb so much.

Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him. But he must ask in faith without any doubting, for the one who doubts is like the surf of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind. For that man ought not to expect that he will receive anything from the Lord, being a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways.
--James 1:2-8

We exult in hope of the glory of God. And not only this, but we also exult in our tribulations, knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance; and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope; and hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us.
--Romans 5:2-5

Why have we decided that when we're hurting, we must be doing something wrong? Trials and tribulations are not always because of our wrong doing. One lady in Sunday school, who had battled many years of cancer, said it so well. She said something to the effect of, I still hurt, I still struggle, I doubt, I fear, the angst is still there, and sometimes I am angry, but I am grounded in the hope that Jesus Christ gives us, and there is nothing that can take that away.

Psalm 911: He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the Lord, "My refuge and my fortress, My God, in whom I trust!"
--Psalm 91:1

As I was reading in Mark, I found a note in my bible that read, "I am not called to be successful; I am called to be faithful." At the same time, every little girl likes to dress up as a princess and pretend that they are successful, intelligent, beautiful, and loved. I am still a little girl. I still pretend. Maybe I need to change my view of successful.

As I have shared some of my struggles with my Mom and Dad, both of them have individually prayed with me. These are special moments in my life. God is powerful!

Unconditional Love

Happy Birthday, America! :)

Friday morning, my first conscience thought was, "Thank you, Jesus!" This was all I could say for about 20 minutes. I am not sure what spurred this on, nor am I sure why it was all I could think for so long, but I found myself simply saying over and over, like a broken record, "Thank you, Jesus!"

You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. These words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand and they shall be as frontals on your forehead. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.
Deuteronomy 6:5-9

Loving God and loving people is an action--it is a definitive choice. We are called to teach His Word, talk about His Word, bind His Word, and write His Word down. Loving God is personal (clearly, not private) and it is a commitment to employ oneself in loving service to Godhead--God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit. Paralleling the scripture above:

I bow my knees before the Father so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; and that you being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled up to all the fullness of God.
Ephesians 3:14, 17-19

Looking at these scriptures, as Christians it is clear that love must be the foundation for ALL we do! When you die, what do you want to be known for? I've heard it said, LOVE! I agree, I want to be known for love!

This past week I was blessed to have my roommate from Ukraine, come and spend a week with myself and my family. I am grateful that we were able to share Christs unconditional love with/on Masha! God is so good to my family, and being able to share that love with another person is beautiful.

Masha and I at Sea World

Faith and Shamu

Masha and I in front of the Steel Eel and then in front of the Shamu car

Masha and Mom

Pretty flowers

Masha and I after the Shamu show

Grounds of the Alamo

Rio River Cruise on the San Antonio Riverwalk

Dad playing with the timer on his camera...Myself, Masha, Mom, Dad

Myself, Levi, and Masha at KSAT

Hope That Does Not Disappoint

I read this devotional this morning and I am encouraged by the hope that shines through the power of love!

Hope That Does Not Disappoint

Romans 5:5 5Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us.

Today, we express hope as if we can’t be sure what will really happen. We say, “I hope I will win that prize. I hope it won’t rain tomorrow. I hope everything works out well.” But “hope” in the Bible is a confident and positive expectation of good. God wants you to have a confident expectation of good because as His child, He favors you. Because Christ is in you, the hope of glory (Colossians1:27), you can expect the glory of God to shine into every area of your life, including your family, job, ministry, health and finances! God’s Word says, “Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us.” You may have experienced disappointed hopes, but there is a hope that does not disappoint when you are conscious of how much God loves you. It is a hope that springs from the heart of God, who loves you very much. It is interesting that the first mention of the Holy Spirit in the book of Romans is tied up with the love of God. The book of Romans is considered foundational for Christians. Could it be that the first thing the Holy Spirit wants to do is to establish in our hearts that God loves us? Many people think that the Holy Spirit has come to teach us about power. But the truth is that the Holy Spirit has come not to reveal the love for power, but the power of love! My friend, you may have just lost your job. But if you can say, “Jesus loves me this I know,” you can also say, “I believe that I will get a better job tomorrow.” Your girlfriend may have just left you for your best friend. But because you can say, “Jesus loves me this I know,” you can also say, “I’ll meet a better girl.” When you believe that God loves you, you will have a positive expectation of good. You will have a hope that does not disappoint. So be careful what you hope for because you are bound to get it!

The Wrath of God

This past Sunday our sermon was about grace and the wrath of God. I love the dichotomy presented here by the loving God we serve. God cares about what is holy, just, and right, so much so that He will NOT compromise with evil!

"Therefore, come out from their midst and be separate," says the Lord.
2 Corinthians 6:17

To be separate involves being equally yoked, using the world without loving the things the world loves, and exhibiting Christlikeness.

For you have been bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body
1 Corinthians 6:20

Isaiah 43:7 tells us that we are created to glorify Christ. 1 Corinthians 6:20 tells us that we are to glorify God in our bodies. My question to you is how do you personally glorify Christ, sharing Gods character, each and every day?

But the one who joins himself to the Lord is one spirit with Him
1 Corinthians 6:17

Firstfruits

This weeks Pastor's Ponderings could not have come at a more timely season of my life. I have been given the opportunity to financially support the child, Yodalis Florentino, that I have been a writing sponsor of for the past couple years. My original thought was, "No way! I have no income. I am still seeking employment. I don't have enough. My car is dying (it's not even in driving condition right now). I do want some money in savings. I am about to go on COBRA. I don't have enough." And then shortly after that, I felt a tug in my heart saying, "You have plenty. I have given you all that you have and I continue to bless you. You will be provided for." Below is a snip-it from the Pastor's Ponderings found in First Press.

I recently read of a missionary who heard a knock on the door of the hut he occupied in Africa. When he answered, he found one of the native boys holding a large fish in his hands. The boy said, "Reverend, you taught us what tithing is, so here--I've brought you my tithe." As the missionary gratefully took the fish, he questioned the young lad, "If this is your tithe, where are the other nine fish?" At this the boy beamed and said, "Oh, they're still back in the river. I'm going back to catch them now."

I too have nine more fish to go catch. I am ready to give my firstfruits to Yodalis to watch him grow and flourish, as a child of God. I am going to trust that God will continue to provide for me.

"We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give"
Winston Churchill