Ranking the 7 Deadly Sins

I found this SCL post both humorous and sadly true on many levels. It has been my experience within my accountability groups that some sins are ranked much worse than others...all sin is ugly!

#1001. Ranking the Seven Deadly Sins

April 22, 2011

(A few weeks ago, John Crist wrote a really good guest post calling out the lies guys sometimes tell about lust and the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue. It ignited a bajillion comment conversation. I got to grab coffee with him a few days after it came out and it was awesome to hear his story and learn more about his faith. He’s a professional comedian, he’s hilarious and he’s a master at finding ways to be funny without ever mocking. I’m a huge fan of John Crist. Here’s his new guest post. Enjoy!)

Ranking the Seven Deadly Sins – By John Crist

My girlfriend broke up with me three months ago. Since then, I’ve realized something profound about love.

If you love someone, let them go, if they come back…it’s only to pick up their dvds.

Truer words have never been spoken my friends.

Since the breakup, I’ve eaten out 21 meals per week. I’m at the point in life where a judge the value of fast food based on how heavy the bag is. Taco Bell’s five-pound box is awesome, and it only costs five bucks!

I figure, “I’ve been hurt, I deserve to feel good. Plus, there’s probably worse things I could be doing to deal with the pain.” Sounds like flawed thinking right? Think again.

I told my accountability group that I was legitimately struggling with food and it had become a means to deal with the pain and you know what happened?…nothing. Seriously, no one cared. The same guys the have raked me over coals for years about lust said nothing, which got me thinking…

Wait, have gluttons been getting a free pass this whole time?!

Three months ago I thought the gluttony free pass was awesome. Now I wear jeans with an elastic waistband (and a braided belt (unrelated))…and I blame my accountability group.

Apparently there’s a rank order to the Seven Deadly Sins that I didn’t know about. Based on responses I’ve gotten in my accountability group over the years, I’d like to present to you:

The Unofficial Guys Accountability Group Seven Deadly Sins Rank Order.

1. LUST: By far the most important and most deadly. If you get caught with this one you could lose your family, your job (unless you’re the president), your marriage and your influence. For me, I tried to justify my lustful tendencies by mixing and matching the five love languages. My first love language, physical gifts. My second, quality touch.

2. GREED: A distant second. Mostly because apparently only young (poor) guys need accountability. Once you hit 30, and hopefully start making serious money, you graduate from the accountability stage of Christianity. Can’t wait. Me? I’ve got a stack of Lincolns burning a hole in my pocket right now. And by stack, I mean roll.

3. ANGER: I get really ticked off when people suggest I have an anger problem. *#%$ and ^&#@!, I’m taking my Bible and I’m going home!!

4. SLOTH: Sloth came in fourth, wanted to be first but missed his alarm clock and slept in. Sloth is pretty easy to spot. If anyone in your group ever says they’re a freelance photographer or a real estate agent, that’s code for unemployed. And did you know video games are more popular than ever with men in their 30s? Their favorite game? Call of Duty: Black Ops, followed by Call of Duty: Command and Conquer. The new version that no one’s been able to beat? Call of Duty…To Your Family.

5. ENVY: The only thing I know about envy is that, in college, I may or may not have gone to local hotspot called Club Envy. The soap dispensers in the bathroom looked awesome. They may or may not now be in my bathroom…but I don’t struggle with Envy.

6. PRIDE: Comes in sixth. Struggles-with-pride guy always checks in last and says something like, “I’m just happy that I don’t struggle with lust, greed, anger, sloth or envy anymore. In fact, I can’t even remember the last time I sinned.” Amen Pride Guy, always do love hearing from you.

7. GLUTTONY: A distant dead last. No one cares about this one. When someone says they struggle with lust, we say, “You’re a FREAK man! Join a 12-step group, throw away your tv, computer and cell phone and don’t come back to group until you get your life in order!” If someone in my group ever said they struggled with gluttony I’d say, “you want to go to lunch and talk about it?”

How would you rank order the Seven Deadly Sins?

And I’m in a guys only group, is the order different for women?

(John Crist loves Jesus and is a standup comic from Denver, Colorado. See his standup and church sketches at youtube.com/user/johnbcrist)

Similarities between Athletes and Christians Part Deux

I received a comment from my last blog posting (Similarities between Athletes and Christians) that I wanted to share with you guys, as I felt the comment was quite appropriate. I also received a devotional a few days later that followed suite.

I know we have all learned a lot through pain. Some of you crazy athletes seem to even seek it out. Maybe that's not a bad idea, maybe it's not seeking it out but just welcoming it as an indicator. Whenever I think of pain and suffering I remember, "A Man for All Seasons and GK Chesterton."

When Richard Rich is trying to convince Thomas More that all men can be bought, obviously they have different ideas-
Thomas More: Buy a man with suffering?
Richard Rich: Impose suffering, and offer him escape
Thomas More: Oh… for a moment I thought you were being profound.

Seems odd to try and purchase a man with suffering. I'm not sure I would sign up for that. Profound that someone did just that. If we are true Christians and co-heirs we should welcome and share not only His glory but also His suffering. Of course, ours will be less then redemptive but that has already been taken care of. If we offer up and give all the glory to God then why not offer up the suffering to Him. I believe we are becoming better for it.

Life is a battle in which the best put their bodies in front, in which God sends only His holiest into the hall of the arrows of hell. In the book of Job is foreshadowed that better doctrine full of dark chivalry that he that bore the worst that men can suffer was the best that bore the form of man.
-GK Chesterton

Purpose-Driven Suffering, by Dwight Edwards

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"But He knows the way I take; when He has tried me, I shall come forth as gold.” Job 23:10

“But He knows...when He has tried me…” There is nothing random about our lives. Every trial, every heartache, every teardrop has to pass inspection by the Sovereign of the universe. A Sovereign Who holds His scepter with nail-pierced hands. As Jeremiah puts, “For He does not afflict willingly (lit. “from His heart”) nor grieve the children of men” (Lam. 3:33). Though He does not afflict “willingly”, He does afflict certainly. And painfully. But it is purpose-driven suffering; with a perfect goal that is beyond what we are able to see many times. No - probably most of the time. C.S. Lewis puts it so well:

“Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and so on: you knew that those jobs needed doing and so you are not surprised. But presently He starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably and does not seem to make sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one you thought of — throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards. You thought you were going to be made into a decent little cottage: but He is building a palace. He intends to come and live in it Himself.”

Elsewhere he writes, “Experience: that most brutal of teachers. But you learn, my God do you learn.”

How true! Left to myself I would settle for a cottage. Maybe you would to. Fortunately God does not leave any of us to our own insipid, pale, milk toast aspirations for spiritual growth. He takes us far beyond where we would ever choose to go on our own. And even though this taking is “that most brutal of teachers” and “hurts abominably” at times; it never hurts randomly. In some way, in some fashion, at some point; it always leads us to a spiritually wealthier place. And in my book, that is no small matter.

Flashpoint: Every trial in our life must pass inspection. And it cannot last a second longer than absolutely necessary.

Similarities between Athletes and Christians

I have quite a few different thoughts rolling around in this head of mine, and so here is a mumble jumble mess of them. Read on if you dare... :)

"Athletes work in and through pain."
--Dave Peterson, Memorial Drive Presbyterian Church

I have grueling 10 mile speed workouts on Tuesdays and Wednesdays are mid week long runs. Most Wednesdays I am quite sore and push through the pain, so that come race day, I am able to run to the best of my abilities. Dave's quote made me think of:

"Although He was a Son He learned obedience from the things which He suffered."
Hebrews 5:8

Pain is a form of suffering. Faith is a form of obedience. I learn in and through painful experiences in life. I could say, "Christians learn in and through pain."

On a different note... I want to share with you from the SCL blog.

Going Solo (Jon Acuff, Stuff Christians Like)

“Are you scared about any of the things that are happening right now?”

My wife asked me this question the other night.

I thought about it for approximately .2 seconds and answered:

“Only if I stop to think about it.”

And that’s the truth, I’m excited and more than a little terrified by the adventure we’re on right now.

What if my new book doesn’t sell? What if I’ve moved my family from Atlanta to Nashville, moved my wife from her group of friends, my kids from their schools, me from the industry I was in for 12 years, in the name of a BIG DREAM and it doesn’t work?

What if?

I don’t doubt that this is exactly where I am supposed to be. I feel incredibly blessed to be doing what I am doing right now. I feel God called us to Nashville and we are on the edge of an adventure he’s been quietly unfolding for years. But sometimes I find myself counting the giants.

And that seems like a pretty common thing to do when we’re called on big adventures. I think about the 12 spies that scouted the Promised Land in Numbers 13.

When they returned, they gave a long report, that can be summarized by one line they said:

“We can’t attack those people; they are stronger than we are.”

It’s easy now to judge the Israelites, but all too often, when we face our own challenges, we say the same thing.

I can’t find a job I want, the economy is horrible.

I can’t hope to fix this relationship, it’s beyond repair.

I can’t sell my house, the situation is hopeless.

I can’t be a successful author, I just have a niche satire blog.

Sometimes, despite our hope or our faith, we make “I can’t statements.” And although this would traditionally be the point in the post where you do the rainbow 180 and say, “You can do anything you set your mind to,” I’m not going to do that. Because I think the Israelites were right when they said “We can’t attack those people; they are stronger than we are.” But here’s a critical truth the Israelites missed, something that trips me up sometimes too:

God never said to do it alone.

God never ordered the Israelites to take the Promised Land with their power and their wisdom and their ability. Not at all. In fact he promises just the opposite in Exodus 6:6-8

‘I am the Lord, and I will bring you out from under the yoke of the Egyptians. I will free you from being slaves to them, and I will redeem you with an outstretched arm and with mighty acts of judgment. I will take you as my own people, and I will be your God. Then you will know that I am the Lord your God, who brought you out from under the yoke of the Egyptians. And I will bring you to the land I swore with uplifted hand to give to Abraham, to Isaac and to Jacob. I will give it to you as a possession. I am the Lord.’”

Look at what he says:

I will bring you out

I will free you

I will redeem you

I will take you as my own people

I will be your God

I will bring you to the land I swore

I will give it to you

Seven times, in three verses, God reminds the Israelites and us that he never calls us on adventures alone.

There’s a long list of things you can’t do. You can’t fight giants. You can’t find a new job. You can’t fix relationships. You can’t. You can’t. You can’t. But God can.

I’m a little scared of what’s ahead, but I’m excited too. I’m just going to take one step at a time. I’m not going to count giants. I’m not going to try to force God’s hand to make things happen the way I want them to. I’m going to take one step at a time and remember that I serve a God who never asks us to go on adventures alone.

I love the I WILL statements! Not only does God tell us what He will do, He promises us that we will never go on adventures alone! What adventures are you and God journeying on together, right now? Are any of these adventures painful? Are you learning through them?

Warm Up

In honour of Valentine's Day, I had my students do the following for their warm up:

• Write 3 things you like about yourself
• Write 3 things you're good at
• Write 3 things you love doing
• Write the names of 3 people you love

I received some great answers and wanted to share some of them...

3 things you like about yourself

• Personality
• I lift spirits
• I am smart
• I am beautiful
• I am respectful
• I am joyful
• I am funny
  
• Positivity
• My dreams
• My attitude
• My honesty
• My confidence
• My swag (for those of you who do not spend most of your day with teenagers, swag is your appearance, your style, and the overall way you present yourself)
  

3 things you're good at

• Math (now that you're my teacher)
• Being a mother
  
• Playing instruments and singing
  
• Cooking
• Building things and solving problems
  
• Decorating
• Choosing clothes/dress
  
• Making friends and making people smile
• Talking
• Girls
  
• Making girls feel pretty
  
• Kissing (this was by far my favourite answer!)
  

3 things you love doing

• Texting
• Chillin'
• Eating hot chips
  
• Being with my Mom and spending time with my fam/bf/gf
  
• Going to church/Praise and worship
  
• Playing soccer
• Being a great mother!
• Swimming and Wakeboarding
• Making and editing music
• Talking to females (Yes! Another fine answer from a young man!)
  

3 people you love

• Godhead--God the Father, God the Son, God the Holy Spirit
  
• Family--Mom, Dad, Husband/Wife, Child, Brothers, Sisters, Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, Grandparents
  
• Me, myself, and I
  
• My b/f or g/f
• Jessica Alba and Anderson Silva (Hahah!)

Happy Valentine's Day

Discipline

The definition of discipline, according to the dictionary, is training that corrects, molds, or perfects the mental faculties or moral character. It is control gained by enforcing obedience or order in a prescribed pattern of behaviour.

I am a very disciplined person. I believe that's one reason long distance running and I are friends. I religiously follow my training schedule. I hope to BQ the 30 April 2011.

It's been said that punishment lasts an hour; discipline lasts a lifetime. Thanks Mom and Dad for teaching me discipline! :)

Love is...

God has placed incredible people in my life that love me, care for me, and encourage me. It is because of and through Jesus Christ love that I experience joy each and everyday! I invite you to listen to my friend Tash, as she sings and plays the piano to a song she wrote. This is one of my favourite songs that was recorded almost ten years ago. The pictures are of Tash and her son, Enoch.

People show and define love in a variety of ways. There are also different types of love. Today I want to focus on some of the amazing and practical ways people have shared their love with me in the past and continue to share their love for me each and everyday!

Love is a hug
Love is a kiss
Love is holding a door open
Love is an encouraging word
Love is a hand written note
Love is spending time with another, yes quantity, it's not just about quality
Love is a walk
Love is a game of cribbage
Love is a shared meal
Love is getting dressed up
Love is rooting for another
Love is believing in another
Love is visiting a sick friend, and just being there
Love is looking out for your friends
Love is being a good loser
Love is listening without interrupting
Love is a having a special song
Love is walking in and through the rain together
Love is helping someone through their battles
Love is giving a Valentines
Love is a great run
Love is a high five
Love is a smile
Love is joy
Love is sunshine
Love is a ski trip
Love is new dishtowels, complete with hearts!
Love is...

What says love to you? Please, add to my list!

Resourceful and a Little Nerdy sprinkled with Generosity

According to Curtis Honeycutt, the person who rocks the duct tape Bible cozy (What you put around your bible to protect it) is resourceful, if not a little nerdy. In case you are not aware, I rock a hot pink, duct tape, bible cozy! Yes! I would like to say this describes me perfectly; resourceful and a little nerdy. :)

On a more serious note, you read about the lady in the bible who gave the least, even though it was all she had...

^{Mark 12:41-44}And He sat down opposite the treasury, and began observing how the people were putting money into the treasury; and many rich people were putting in large sums. A poor widow came and put in two small copper coins, which amount to a cent. Calling His disciples to Him, He said to them, "Truly I say to you, this poor widow put in more than all the contributors to the treasury; for they all put in out of their surplus, but she, out of her poverty, put in all she owned, all she had to live on."

Sometimes Bible stories seem so surreal, so out of date; I question what would it would look like in today's world. This story of generosity blows me away!

At the Noblesville Wal-Mart on Sunday, the generosity from those that you could tell could not afford much was absolutely unbelievable. I think we collected 9-10 full carts of food over 4.5 hours.

The story that stands out the most is a grandmother who had her grandson with her. It appeared they lived together and she was raising him. They parked in the first handicap space right in front of the store entry. She took a flier when going in and said thank you.

Upon coming out, she had only about 15 items in her cart. She stopped and said she unfortunately did not have much to give, but she has needed a food pantry in the past from 25 years of being an alcoholic and will never forget being helped when she could not afford to help herself. She said in front of her grandson she had been sober for the last 11 years.

She told her grandson to donate what he wanted. He started giving his favorite cereal, the Wal-Mart brand Crunchberries, his raisins, Spaghetti O’s and several other items that any kid would want to eat. Then the grandmother gave soups and other things only leaving a couple of items in her cart.

They went to their car that looked like it was not worth $100. No hub caps and rusted. It would not start for several minutes and we thought we needed to get her help. With the front door open so she could hear the engine as she turned the key and pumped the gas, her persistence and technique won out.

We thought they were leaving when the grandson popped out of the front seat and came running over with their bag of a dozen apples. We had tears in our eyes. We were reminded of the lady in the bible who gave the least in the plate, but Jesus knew she gave pretty much all she had. God bless this grandmother who that day taught her grandson the best lesson of his life.

Chevron Houston Marathon

I would have loved to have been able to run the Chevron Houston Marathon, but instead...I went out to cheer on the runners, watch the elite runners (the winner ran a 2:07:04, FULL, from Ethiopia), and encourage people along the way!

My friend Steven, helped me come up with a great idea for a sign, and then it made the news!

Watch at 4:20, to see my moment of fame, here in Houston, TX! :)

The Preemptive Meet and Greet

I love this posting by Jon! I wish more people were like this...I want to to be more like this.

The Preemptive Meet and Greet

Last Sunday, I grabbed seats in church while my wife brought the kids to Sunday School. I usually use those few minutes of wait time to dump every idea I have in my head into a moleskine notebook or evernote on my iPhone. (Idea generation is one of the parts of my brain I have to quiet a little if I’m really going to focus on worship.) A few minutes after sitting down, a couple in their 50s slid in next to me. The wife, immediately said, “Hi, I’m Patty and this is my husband Mark!”

I was honestly flabbergasted by this gesture.

Not that it was rude. I was touched that Patty wanted to meet me. I was honored that she wanted to introduce me to her husband. I just wasn’t expecting it. Why?

Patty had executed a perfect “Preemptive Meet and Greet.”

She didn’t wait for the guy running the announcements to tell us, “turn to your neighbor and say hello.” She didn’t wait for the pastor to ask us to turn to our neighbor with an assignment, “Ask the person next to you if they enjoyed the snow last week.” Nope, Patty just went for it and it was actually pretty awesome.

I think there are a few reasons this was such a great experience:

1. Patty didn’t front hug me.

Shaking the hand of a stranger on a Sunday morning is a great. I got to meet Patty! Things would have been very different though if she slid next to me and said, “Hi, I’m Patty! I’m a hugger. Get over here. It’s going to be a long one too, you person I’ve never laid eyes on before.” (Hard to say if a side hug would have worked in that situation or not.)

2. Patty kept the handshake simple.

It always kills me when you meet a stranger and your very first handshake is a complicated, 12 step, snap + half hug move. I feel like I’m being inducted into the secret Stonecutters guild. Patty kept the handshake simple and straightforward. We locked hands, shook approximately 2.3 times and broke it off. Anyone who saw it could not have mistaken us as members of the Crips or the Bloods.

3. Patty didn’t race our pastor Pete Wilson.

Our church doesn’t usually do the “meet and greet.” It seemed like Patty knew that and was taking the situation into her own hands. If Cross Point did regularly do a meet and greet, then Patty’s gesture could have been interpreted as her beating Pete Wilson to the punch. Kind of an “in your face, been there done that,” meet and greet touchdown dance.

At this point, some of you might be thinking, “I always greet people I sit next to, I guess my faith is rich and warm and filled with community, you cold hearted monster of a man.” I think that’s a little extreme considering all I said was that I didn’t want to share a long front hug with a stranger, but you’re certainly entitled to your own opinion. I personally think the Patty interchange was perfect.

When my wife slid into our row a couple of minutes later, I excitedly said, “Jenny, this is Patty and her husband Mark!” We felt like old friends by that point, which I think is ultimately the goal of the preemptive meet and greet.

Have you ever experienced a preemptive meet and greet?

Does your church do the meet and greet during service?

The trouble with fruit...or running long distance

Jon Acuff continues to challenge me with his blog postings, thoughts, and ideas. Read on, my friends. :)

The Trouble With Fruit

I’m starting to hate Gordo.

At first, he seemed like a good guy. Always around, up for a good time, he was the life of a party. Now though, after spending a few months with him, I beginning to think he might be a bad influence.

On my pants.

Over the last few months I’ve been hanging out way too much with “Gordo’s Cheese Dip,” the microwaveable version of queso that Walmart sells. I put on 10 pounds and several pairs of my pants are suddenly too short. At first I hoped it was the arrival of my much prayed for late growth spurt that would add a foot to my height, thus allowing me to dunk. But unfortunately that is not the case.

Now clearly, 10 extra pounds is not a massive crisis, but let’s do the math. I gained 10lbs in four months. Over a year, that’s a potential 30 extra pounds. That is a big deal. So I did what I did in college to get in shape, I ran three times and thought about being healthy. But apparently, your metabolism goes on sabbatical when you turn 35 because that did nothing.

Frustrated, and now wearing pants from the “husky” side of my closet, I decided something needed to change. I started eating a slow carb diet. I read that people who keep food photo diaries made better eating decisions so I started to take a photo of all my meals. I stopped eating snacks after dinner and quit drinking soda. I started going to a trainer three days a week with some buddies from work.

And in the middle of this new found discipline, I realized something disappointing:

I apply more focus and purpose to my diet than I do my deity.

With gusto I was now devouring spinach and drinking massive amounts of water. I was eating legumes by the bushel, two words I had never even used before. I was killing myself in the gym with a football style weight sled called the “prowler.” I made a commitment to being healthy and was executing that commitment with ferocity.

All the while ignoring my faith.

I’d read the Bible, if I thought of it.

I’d grab a quiet time, if nothing else came up.

I’d pray in between things, if I could fit God into the margins of my day.

And although my pants started to fit better after a few weeks, my heart and soul continued to suffer as I treated God like a casual hobby, not a critical savior. Have you ever done that? Have you ever said, “I just have such a hard time maintaining a consistent quiet time! I’m just not good at forming habits!” Meanwhile, your diet is on point, you never miss an episode of your favorite TV show and your weekly progress reports to your boss are a well organized thing of beauty.

I probably wouldn’t have been so bothered by my realization about my diet if the Bible was fuzzy on this issue, but it is unfortunately not. Here is what Proverbs 3:9 says:

“Honor the Lord with your wealth, with the firstfruits of all your crops”

That word, “firstfruits” is a powerful one. We’re not called to give God the last scraps of our fruit, the remainder, but rather the “firstfruits.” Now clearly, there are financial ramifications to that verse, but what if it’s bigger than that? What if we’re called to give:

The firstfruits of our time.

The firstfruits of our creativity.

The firstfruits of our focus.

The firstfruits of our energy.

The firstfruits of our love.

Can you imagine what church would be like if members gave the firstfruits of their creativity to the Lord? We complain that the church is cheesy sometimes. Of course it is, we’ve been feeding it rotten fruit.

Can you imagine what church would be like if we gave the firstfruits of our love? We like to take shots at the church for being unloving and judgmental. Of course it is, we’ve been feeding it rotten fruit.

Can you imagine what it would be like for your life if you gave God the firstfruits of your time? I can’t because all too often I’ve given him rotten fruit. But I’m trying to change that and I’ve already learned something new in the process.

When I give God my firstfruits in the morning, when I start the day with him, it’s like putting on 3D glasses. The rest of the day looks different. I can see his hand more clearly, hear his voice louder, and feel his touch closer.

I’m not perfect at the firstfruits concept. At heart, this is an “I’m failing, but don’t want to” post. But with grace and hope, I’m working on being more deliberate with my firstfruits.

Let’s stop giving God our last fruits.

Jon Acuff could not have hit the nail harder on the head. I run anywhere from 45-65 miles per/week, depending where in my training schedule I am. I run in rain, cold weather, heat, humidity, you name it...but I am not near as good at reading my bible and spending time in the Word, as I am at keeping up with my running schedule. God doesn't call me to run, then spend time with Him, God asks for the firstfruits of my time.

I believe the consequences of spending more time with Jesus, would be quite positive. The thought of feeding Christ rotten fruit is sad. And far too many days, I don't even give Jesus the rotten old fruit, my quiet time just goes by the wayside.

My challenge to you (and myself) this week, is to give to Christ the firstfruits of our creativity, focus, energy, love, and time. How are you going to bless others this week?

I am strong, when I am on your shoulders...

The past few weeks have been fabulous, but they've also been challenging! On my drive back to H-Town, I was listening to my Zune on shuffle all, and I was reminded of this hymn.

When I am down and, oh my soul, so weary;
When troubles come and my heart burdened be;
Then, I am still and wait here in the silence,
Until you come and sit awhile with me.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up... To more than I can be.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up... To more than I can be.

There is no life - no life without its hunger;
Each restless heart beats so imperfectly;
But when you come and I am filled with wonder,
Sometimes, I think I glimpse eternity.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up... To more than I can be.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up... To more than I can be.

You raise me up... To more than I can be.

Today's sermon was about staying in the midst of difficult situations, even when we just want to run away. We were reminded of Paul's choice of staying in the jail cell, and praising God, where he was at. God uses our testimony for His glory. It is Christ who gives me strength, who places me on His shoulders, when troubles come, and my heart is burdened. Gods response is simple, He comes and sits with me a while. He then picks me up, places me on His shoulder, allowing me to stand on the highest mountain, and cross the stormy seas.

Dad and I

Fort Sam Houston Army 10 Miler and Memorial 20 Miler

Race: Fort Sam Houston Army 10 Miler and Memorial 20 Miler
Distance: 20 miles
Goal: Have fun! (I knew I could complete the 20 miles!)
Goal Time: None
Actual Time: 03:04:22 (9:13 min/mi)

This was a fun weekend! My friend, John came down with me, and he ran the 10 miler, while I ran the 20 miler. John and I ran the first mile together, and then after that I increased my speed to catch up with my friend Bee. Bee and I ran miles 4-10 together. Due to a prior injury, and not wanting to continue to hurt herself, and a lack of training, Bee finished at the ten mile point. I continued to run, and ran the entire 20 miles. Bee even came out around mile 13 to cheer me on and take pics! My time was nothing spectacular; I finished, and I enjoyed the run. :)

Leaving your Bible at home...

This blog entry cracked me up! Especially the part about Sunday's being a free ride! :) Read on and enjoy!

Feeling Bad About Leaving Your Bible At Home When You Go On Vacation

December 10, 2010

(John Crist is a stand up comedian. He’s a professional funny person. He just opened up for Louie Anderson out in Vegas. And today he’s sharing an awesome, hilarious guest post. Enjoy)

I just booked my flight home for Christmas. Things are already starting to get awkward between me and my Bible.

You see, my Bible and I have the relationship of a typical church couple. In public, we get along like feltboard Joseph and Mary. But when it’s just us, we feud like Christians and anyone who opposes Glen Beck.

Every time I go out of town the same mental exchange happens. He wants to go with me, I don’t have room in my bag.

I typically goes something like this…

“You might need me,” my Bible says. “What if the person sitting next to you on the plane asks about the Roman Road?”

“Yeah,” I argue sarcastically. “And when we’re all watching the game at the bar and the John 3:16 sign pops up behind the goal post some drunk guy is gonna yell out, ‘HEY! Pause this game! What does John 3:16 actually say? Does anyone have a Bible?’”

“Stop mocking me. You’re gonna leave me here ALL weekend,” he responds, “with Mere Christianity and Every Man’s Battle?”

“Its only three days,” I say. “Plus, everyone know that Christians don’t do devotions on Sundays…so technically, its only two days.”

“Wait,” he asks surprised. “Christians don’t do devotions on Sundays?!

“No, its kind of an unspoken free pass. We figure going to church counts as our devotions.” I say, then pausing awkwardly. “I mean, I’ll write a guest post for Stuff Christians Like and ask all the other Christians what they do…but I’m pretty sure that’s pretty standard.”

I keep packing, refusing to make eye contact.

“Here’s the deal,” I say honestly, “I usually bring you along for the same reasons I keep the Christian stations preset in my car radio. I never listen to them but I feel like my car will spontaneously explode Mission Impossible style if I substitute “Safe for the Whole family” for “Denver’s #1 Party station.”

“No one will even notice me,” he pleads. “I’ve done everything I can in the last couple years to disguise myself so no one else knows I’m actually a Bible.”

I confess. “Its not just about this trip. I’ve been avoiding you like a church acquaintance who’s just joined a pyramid scheme.”

“We’ve been together for 17 years, I should be at toothbrush status by now!” he says, “Never spend the night somewhere without it.”

“Yeah,” I sigh, “but you’re more like towel status. I assume the place I’m going will have one.”

“Oh, I see where your heart is,” he says, like he knows something I don’t.

“OH! Now you gonna go all “rich young ruler” on me?!”

“I’m just sayin,” he responds calmly.

“We don’t even hang out anymore anyway!!”

“I wish we spent more time together.”

“I would, but all my Christian friends are skeptical of our relationship now anyway because when we DO hang out its always at night, they say you’re a morning person?”

“Don’t listen to them. I’m here for you whenever you need me.”

“The only time you ever want to hang out is when I’m really tired or right after I’ve done something really bad!”

“Fine.”

“FINE!”

I slam the door and walk out.

“Actually, one more thing,” I walk back in and grab my Bible. “I’m nervous that my roommates will see you on my nightstand and judge me because I didn’t bring you along…sooooo, I’m gonna have to put you in the sock drawer. Sorry!!!”

(For more great stuff from John, check out his Youtube page.)